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Archaeologists have uncovered a 2024 time capsule containing nothing but expired COVID tests and a single crypto wallet with $0.03 in Shiba Inu. "This perfectly captures our era's misplaced optimism," said the lead researcher, brushing Cheeto dust off a petrified TikTok dance tutorial. The capsule's most puzzling artifact is a sticky note that just says "cancel student debt?" in fading Sharpie. READ THE SATIRE: https://spintaxi.com/2186-2/