我们为何忧心忡忡：奇怪的回报周期及应对之策
简悦花园Why we worry: The ABC method for mindfully managing worry
我们为何忧虑：用心管理忧虑的 ABC 方法
We spend a lot of time worrying. About work, money, friends, family, the future. For most people, it’s not the kind of paralyzing worry that prevents us from getting anything done. It’s more akin to background noise which we can be pretty good at ignoring. But it’s still there.\ 我们花了很多时间去担心。关于工作、金钱、朋友、家庭和未来。对大多数人来说，这并不是那种让我们无法完成任何事情的瘫痪性担忧。它更像是背景噪音，我们可以很好地将其忽略。但它依然存在。
It makes it harder than we’d like to fall asleep, and it sometimes hinders our decision-making when we focus on what could go wrong instead of what could go right. Worrying can lead to fatigue and irritation. If it’s so bad for us, why do we worry? Why is it that such an anxiety-inducing mental state is so common?\ 它让我们难以入睡，有时还会阻碍我们的决策，因为我们关注的是可能出错的地方，而不是可能正确的地方。担心会导致疲劳和烦躁。如果担心对我们如此有害，我们为什么还要担心呢？为什么这种令人焦虑的精神状态如此普遍？
Worrying is rewarding 担忧是一种回报
Despite all our efforts, we have very little control over our lives. We cannot guarantee outcomes based on effort only. We put in the work, but the future is uncertain. We could get sick, lose someone, miss an important meeting. The number of imponderables is infinite.\ 尽管我们做出了种种努力，但我们对自己生活的掌控却微乎其微。我们无法仅凭努力来保证结果。我们付出了努力，但未来是不确定的。我们可能生病、失去亲人、错过重要会议。不确定的事情数不胜数。
So we keep asking ourselves: what if…?\ 因此，我们不断地问自己：如果……？
And research suggests that excessive worriers have beliefs about the positive consequences of worrying, which reinforces their worrying behavior.\ 研究表明，过度忧虑者相信忧虑会带来积极的后果，这强化了他们的忧虑行为。
“Each time we worry and nothing bad happens, our mind connects worry with preventing harm,” explains Dr Seth Gillihan, a professor of psychology at the University of Pennsylvania. We unconsciously think that, after all, it was a good thing to be worried.\ "宾夕法尼亚大学心理学教授塞斯 - 吉利汉博士解释说：" 每次我们担心而没有坏事发生时，我们的大脑就会把担心与防止伤害联系起来。我们会不自觉地认为，毕竟担心是件好事。
A study assessing positive beliefs about worry identified four main factors which may explain why worrying feels, paradoxically, so rewarding:\ 一项对担忧的积极信念进行评估的研究确定了四个主要因素，这四个因素或许可以解释为什么担忧会让人感觉如此有成就感：
- Proactive problem solving. We feel like worrying helps us be more aware of a situation and be better prepared to face it. It might encourage us to come up with more alternative ways to solve a potential problem and avoid the most negative consequences. We see worry as a tool to adopt more productive attitudes, making us responsible, prudent people—the adults in the room.\ 积极主动地解决问题。我们觉得，担心有助于我们更好地了解情况，为面对问题做好更充分的准备。它可能会鼓励我们想出更多替代方法来解决潜在问题，避免最不利的后果。我们把担心视为一种工具，可以让我们采取更有成效的态度，让我们成为负责任、谨慎的人 -- 房间里的成年人。
- Protection from negative emotions. Worrying feels like it may help us not be caught off guard and be less disappointed if something bad actually happens. We feel like we won’t be as upset if we predicted that particular negative outcome.\ 防止负面情绪。如果真的发生了不好的事情，担心似乎可以帮助我们不至于措手不及，减少失望。我们觉得，如果我们预测到了那种特定的负面结果，我们就不会那么沮丧。
- Positive self-perception. We might see a tendency to worry as a positive personality trait. Worrying about other people may confirm—in our own eyes or the eyes of others—that we are a sensitive, considerate, caring person. We may even feel like people around us would be disappointed if we didn’t worry about them. We basically conflate worrying with being a good person.\ 积极的自我认知。我们可能会把忧虑倾向视为一种积极的人格特质。在我们自己或他人眼中，担心他人可能会证实我们是一个敏感、体贴、有爱心的人。我们甚至会觉得，如果我们不担心身边的人，他们会很失望。基本上，我们把担心和做一个好人混为一谈了。
- Magical thinking. Finally, we may think that the act of worrying itself can reduce the risk of something bad happening, which, for some people, can be superstitious.\ 神奇的想法。最后，我们可能会认为，担心的行为本身可以降低坏事发生的风险，这对某些人来说可能是迷信。
Remarkably, the first factor alone accounted for 32% of the variance in scores in the study. While the authors noted the relatively small sample size, they thought it was worth highlighting the apparent importance of problem solving and motivation.\ 值得注意的是，在这项研究中，仅第一个因素就占了分数差异的 32%。虽然作者指出样本量相对较小，但他们认为值得强调的是解决问题和动机的明显重要性。
This factor is particularly relevant for people who are problem-solvers. There’s a fine line between worrying and problem-solving. Worrying is about letting your mind dwell on problems without a systematic approach, often leading to anxiety. Problem-solving is about applying creative strategies and mental models to specific problems.\ 这个因素对于那些善于解决问题的人来说尤为重要。忧虑和解决问题之间有一条微妙的界线。忧虑是指没有系统地思考问题，往往会导致焦虑。而解决问题则是运用创造性的策略和思维模式来解决具体问题。
Staying up at night, your mind racing, imagining all of the potentially negative outcomes of a decision—this is worry. Sitting down with a notepad, pen in hand, ready to sketch a mind map and identify potential solutions—this is problem-solving.\ 夜不能寐，思绪万千，想象一个决定可能带来的所有负面结果 -- 这就是忧虑。坐下来，手拿记事本和笔，准备勾画思维导图，找出潜在的解决方案，这就是解决问题。
Mindful ways to manage worry
用心管理忧虑的方法
So, how can we manage worry? Is it possible to completely eliminate it? The truth is, no—worry is a natural part of life which we can’t avoid entirely.\ 那么，我们该如何管理忧虑呢？有可能完全消除烦恼吗？事实上，"无忧" 是生活的一个自然组成部分，我们无法完全避免。
However, while you may not be able to get rid of it altogether, there are simple strategies that can help you reduce its impact. By learning to recognize and manage worry, you can create more mental space for peace and focus.\ 然而，虽然你可能无法完全摆脱它，但有一些简单的策略可以帮助你减少它的影响。通过学习识别和管理忧虑，你可以创造更多的心理空间，让自己更加平静和专注。
- Awareness. The first step to managing worry is becoming aware of it. Notice when you start worrying, and instead of trying to push the feeling away, take a moment to study it. Why are you worried? What’s the root cause? This is the power of metacognition: simply acknowledging and understanding what your mind is doing allows you to engage with your worry more intentionally.\ 意识。控制忧虑的第一步是意识到它。注意你何时开始担心，不要试图推开这种感觉，而是花点时间研究一下。你为什么会担心？根本原因是什么？这就是元认知的力量：只需承认并理解你的大脑在做什么，就能让你更有意识地与忧虑打交道。
- Boundaries. Even with second-level thinking, it’s impossible to predict every outcome—and that’s okay. Uncertainty is an inherent part of being alive. While we can’t control everything that happens in life, that doesn’t mean we should hold back from living fully. Setting mental boundaries around what you can and cannot control will help you live with less worry and more freedom.\ 界限。即使是二级思维，也不可能预测每一个结果 -- 这没关系。不确定性是生命的固有组成部分。虽然我们无法控制生活中发生的一切，但这并不意味着我们应该放弃充分生活。围绕你能控制和不能控制的事情设定心理界限，会让你在生活中少一些担忧，多一些自由。
- Calm. Worry is often linked to stress and anxiety. To calm your nervous system, try one or several calming exercises. Breathe slowly, stretch, or meditate. Take a long bath or read a good fiction book. Go for a walk. Watch a movie. While you should not run away from challenges, taking your mind off things for a specified amount of time can restore your sense of calm and improve your ability to think clearly.\ 冷静担忧通常与压力和焦虑有关。要让神经系统平静下来，可以尝试一种或几种平静练习。慢慢呼吸、伸展或冥想。洗个长澡或读一本好的小说。散散步。看电影。虽然你不应该逃避挑战，但在一定时间内转移注意力可以恢复你的平静感，提高你清晰思考的能力。
Awareness, boundaries, calm… This is the ABC of managing worry in a mindful way. These strategies are simple, but it doesn’t mean they’re always easy to apply. Dealing with worry often means confronting our fears—whether it’s fear of failure, fear of judgment, or fear of missing out on a better option.\ 意识、界限、冷静…… 这就是用心管理烦恼的 ABC。这些策略很简单，但并不意味着它们总是很容易应用。处理忧虑通常意味着直面我们的恐惧 -- 无论是害怕失败、害怕被评判，还是害怕错过更好的选择。
Acknowledging our limited control can feel unsettling, but it’s crucial so we can move forward. Instead of wasting mental energy on outcomes we can’t predict or control, we can focus on our output.\ 承认我们的控制力有限可能会让人感到不安，但这对我们向前迈进至关重要。与其把精力浪费在我们无法预测或控制的结果上，不如专注于我们的产出。
Of course, leaving your worries behind takes practice. It’s in our nature to worry. And sometimes, worry creeps on us when we least expect it. But by becoming more aware of your thoughts, setting healthy boundaries around what you can and cannot control, and actively working to calm your mind, you can make worry more manageable.\ 当然，抛开烦恼需要练习。忧虑是我们的天性。有时，忧虑会在我们最意想不到的时候悄然而至。但是，通过更多了解自己的想法，为自己能控制和不能控制的事情设定健康的界限，并积极努力让自己的心平静下来，就能让忧虑变得更容易控制。
Over time, this process can help you become more compassionate, productive, and creative. In the end, you may even learn how to worry well—using it as a tool for growth rather than letting it hold you back.\ 随着时间的推移，这个过程可以帮助你变得更有同情心、更有生产力、更有创造力。最后，你甚至可以学会如何把忧虑作为一种成长的工具，而不是让它阻碍你的成长。
Generated by RSStT. The copyright belongs to the original author.