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As dawn drew upon the city of Seoul, clouds formed overhead and thundered. It started softly; a few raindrops pattering on the ground, sizzling as they landed. Only a few moments later would the few raindrops turn into millions across the Isle, every second. Puddles of the acidic substance began to plink and ripple from the rain above, growing their size.

Over in an apartment, Nayeon sat in her room, scouring over many volumes of texts and tomes to study for her class. The weekend might have arrived, but unlike other people, Nayeom had not a moment to waste. Between studying, working, and fighting with her parents over her newly-dyed hair, it was a lot for the young witch to handle. There was one relief she could hold onto; Mina. After kissing her on the cheek a week ago, the two had confessed their feelings for each other and began dating. They went to for a cute museum date and had their first kiss on the Hangang Park. It was a wonderful day, but it threw her whole week off course. Now, she had a multitude of textbooks scattered on her desk, prepared to be read to catch her up on college works. Still, the memories of the carnival and Mina were something she wouldn’t trade the world for.

Amity’s morning began rather calmly, unlike most of the past few days. Her parents were gone from the house, out meeting with the Emperor’s Coven regarding their Abomitons. Meanwhile, Edric and Emira were somewhere in their manor, preparing pranks for when their parents came home. Amity sighed in relief at the thought of them. Deep down, she loved their playful antics, but she was glad that they were respecting her boundaries more now.

Regardless of the comforting notion of her siblings, Amity felt an eerie and peculiar aura about the morning. It was something so intangible that she couldn’t describe it. The rain, a usually calming sight to see out of her window, now felt out of place. Where once, she would enjoy watching it fall down into the rippling puddles, she now saw it as something that needed to go away. Amity stared out the window and watched the rain droplets zip by her window. She knew that she couldn’t control the rain, so she tried to stamp out her thoughts of wanting it to stop.

In an attempt to distract herself, she turned back to her textbooks. Just moments ago, she would have been able to look at each book and think of a plan to efficiently read them all, what to highlight, and what notes to take on them. But now, she could barely look at any of them. The writing on all of the open textbooks jumbled together and danced feverishly in her vision.

Titan, no Amity thought to herself. She threw her hand back, over the backrest on her chair. She looked up to the ceiling and begged for this to not happen, not now. There’s never a good time to have it happen, so it didn’t matter if she was alone or out in public, she just didn’t want it to ever happen. As she lowered her head to look back down at her textbooks, her breathing hitched- then a deep breath. A short exhale- Then a long, drawn-out inhale that gave her a moment to gather her thoughts- but it was cut off by another short-lived exhale. With her breathing erratic, she instinctively raised her palm to her chest, feeling for a heartbeat. The fast and fluttering beats confirmed her suspicions. Amity was having a panic attack.

The war-drum-like heart palpitations seemingly inspired her mind to carry out the attack further. Her heartbeat quickened, her breathing had no rhythm to it, her thoughts were scattered and incomplete. Amity struggled to think; such a simple thing, yet it was rendered impossible by the attack. Every moment she attempted to focus and regain control, she was bombarded by other more worrying thoughts. These textbooks are too much to handle right now. When do mom and dad get home? Are Ed and Em still here? What if I fail the tests on Monday? I gotta read the- What if mom and dad yell at me agai- Where’s my pen? Stop, I need to focus- I need to respond to Boscha’s text, she’s been so mad recently- I can’t read these textbooks, it’s too much to handle- Does Mina actually like me- Where- Are mom and dad- When’s this test- When- Wait, where is- No, wait, I need to focus- Where’s my pen? In my hand-

In what extremely brief moments of clarity Amity had, she begged herself to stop - but there was no escape from this. In one of those moments, she observed the absurdity of it all. Here she was, just moments ago studying. From an outside perspective, they would see the same thing; a witch looking down at her textbooks. What they wouldn’t be able to see is the incomprehensible fear that Amity was experiencing. Amity remained still and so quiet, but inside she was struggling and reaching for some semblance of control to be returned to her.

Regardless of how overwhelming her thoughts were, Amity still had some control of her motor skills. She could get up and find someone who could help her. Yet, as she tried to get up, she found herself questioning if she should ask for help. Would I be a burden? No one should deal with me right now. It wouldn’t be fair to them. Amity felt these thoughts place their hands on her shoulders and push her back down into her seat. Defeated by these notions, Amity returned to looking at her textbooks, drowning in worrying thoughts. It’s not fair , she thought. I shouldn’t feel this way.

* * *

Hours had passed, and not much of Amity’s situation had changed. Her heart continued its hectic pace, her breathing was still unstable, and the thoughts in her head were still racing. One thought kept coming back to her, however. Regardless of how many times her thoughts reset, one thought kept pestering her, begging her to be listened to - I need to tell someone about this.

Easier said than done. Each time Amity tried to stand up, she would clench her eyes as they watered up. No, I can’t bother people . This is your battle, not theirs. Upon thinking this, a staggering sense of isolation overcame Amity. She was all alone. No one understood what she was going through, and no one could help, she thought. In the face of something unconquerable as this panic attack, she realized she was helpless. This merely agitated the growing anxiety inside her and strengthened the attack, becoming so unbearable. All of her symptoms heightened; her heart sped up, her breathing faster than ever and irregular, and her thoughts were so scattered and racing that they barely had time to be thought of fully.

Back again was that thought; I need to tell someone about this. It was desperately grasping out as if to grab hold of Amity and lift her from her chair. Its beckoning was drowned out by the other thoughts, yet, it was so unique from them that it was hard for her to ignore. The most peculiar thing was that Amity wanted to tell someone, she desired to escape this isolation, but her panic attack held nearly full control over her.

Who would I even talk to? She pondered. For a few moments of respite in an otherwise thundering, swirling storm of thoughts, she considered her options. Ed and Em? They are right here, after all… but I’d feel so weird confiding in them about this. Boscha?- No, no way. Ever since I started hanging out with Luz, she’s been distant. Plus she’s not very understanding- Wait. Mina! Of course! For a fleeting moment, she felt happy. After a day of intense anxiety and panic, it was so strange to feel her lips shift upward and her eyes widen. Yet, just as quickly as the thought came, she shut it down. No… I don’t want to bother her either . Even still, some courage remained in her to act upon this idea.

Amity walked over to the Crow-phone in her room and pressed it to record a message. She went to speak but hesitated a few times out of fear. The fear that Mina might see Amity as weak, that she might not be willing to talk with Amity. She held the Crow in her hands and wondered if this was a stupid idea. I need to tell someone , she thought. She braced herself and pressed the button again to try recording a message.

“Mina,” she said, before covering her mouth. Her eyes shut as tears swelled. After a few seconds, she took a deep breath and spoke again. “I could really… use someone to talk to. Let me know if you can”. Amity pressed the button and felt some relief, if for just a second. Okay, step one: done. Now, step two: send it out . She looked at the window and saw that it was still raining. Hopefully, she could just open the window, release the Crow, and close it before any rain could fall into her room. She didn’t need her mother yelling that she'd tarnished the important Anguish Wood flooring.

As Amity approached the window, thoughts clouded her mind. Don’t do this, don’t do this, she doesn’t want to talk, she doesn’t want to deal with your problems.

Don’t humiliate yourself and show her how broken you are. You shouldn’t feel this way.

Even still, that recurring thought shone through the darker thoughts: I need to talk to someone . With that, Amity quickly sent the Crow out her window and closed it. Now it was time to wait.

And she did. Amity waited minutes, which turned into ten minutes. If Mina would have sent a message, it would have been back by now. Ten minutes turned into fifteen. Then twenty. Then thirty. Amity stared at the window, but no Crow showed up. She sat on her bed, knees drawn to her body, arms wrapped around them. She dug her face into her knees as tears welled up. I knew it , she thought. I shouldn’t have bothered her. Now she’s annoyed. She’s probably holding onto the Crow so that she doesn’t have to respond. You’re such an idiot.

Just as Amity letting out whimpers and tears began to stain her clothes, she heard a knock at the front door of the manor. Then, the sound of four feet running echoed in the hallway. Amity’s curiosity out-strengthened her anxiety and found the courage to stand up and put an ear to her door to listen.

“It’s my date!” Edric said aloud

“Are you sure it’s them?” Emira replied. “They’re not supposed to be here for another hour.”

“It’s gotta be them!” Edric unlocked the front doors and the sound of the door whipping open echoed throughout the manor. “Hey, so glad you could- make it?”

“Mina?” Emira said. Amity’s heart quickened its pace, regardless of beating so fast all day. “Here to pick up Mittens looking like that?”

“Well- No,” Mina said sternly. “I really need to go talk to her.” The Twins gave a soft chuckle, followed by the sound of footsteps coming towards Amity’s room. Oh no, she’s actually here - I can’t believe she came out all this way to see me - I don’t deserve this! I’m not ready!

“Little Mittens has been cooped up in here all day, probably writing in her diary about you,” Edric teased.

“Have fun,” Emira said as the twins walked back to their rooms. Luz knocked on the door, causing Amity to stumble backward. No, no, no. I shouldn’t have made her do this!

“Hey, Amity? It’s Luz... Are you there?” Amity knew she couldn’t make Luz come all this way just to be ignored. She approached the door and slowly turned the handle and opened it. Before her stood Luz, clothes tattered, hair singed, skin burnt in some places.

“L-L… Luz… what…?” Amity struggled to speak, but the question got across to the human.

“Oh! Sorry,” she sheepishly chuckled. “I got your Crow, but I don’t really know how to use it. So I just decided it would be better to come here. Plus, you sounded really sad. I want to be here for you!” Luz gave a smile, hoping it would cheer Amity up, but the witch’s lips didn’t move.

“Luz, I’m… I’m so… s-sorry,” Amity said in between sniffles. Luz’s eyes widened.

“Sorry? For what?” she asked.

“For… making you come here.” Amity’s sniffles now became involuntary as she began hyperventilating, forcing her to breathe through her nose. She looked away from Luz as tears brimmed her eyelids.

“No, no Amity, it's okay! I want to be here!” Luz said, placing a hand on Amity’s shoulder. She wants to be here?... Tears streamed down Amity’s face, and as much as she tried to hold in any sound coming from her mouth, she failed. Soft whimpers escaped her that quickly became loud, uncontrollable sobbing. “It’s okay,” Luz continued. “I’m here for you. Can I hug you?”

“P-please” Amity quickly said, nearly cutting Luz’s question off. Luz gently wrapped her arms around Amity, while Amity’s arms flung around Luz and pulled her in tightly. She felt so vulnerable, yet free to cry. To just let out her tears that she had been so desperately trying to keep in all day.

“Oh, Amity,” Luz said, tearing up as well. “Don’t worry, I’m here. I’ll listen and talk to you.” Amity’s whole body felt so weak. She had been enduring a racing heart and erratic breathing all day, and now, Luz wasn’t disappointed or upset to talk with her. She should have known that she would, but it was still such a relief to know that she was willing to. It was such a shock that she felt like she could finally let go and release all the tension in her body, rather than tensing up in fear. She felt herself start to slump to the floor, but Luz held her up.

“Woah, here, here,” Luz said as she walked them both over to Amity’s bed. “Let’s sit here so you can relax. I just spent the past twenty minutes running here, so I could relax too”. Luz chuckled at the end, hoping to make Amity laugh with that joke. Still, the witch sniffled and let tears race down her cheeks. “Amity,” Luz said in a more genuine tone. “I’m so thankful that you told me you wanted to talk. I would rather be here talking to you then let you be here alone for another second.” Amity’s grip on Luz tightened even more at that comment before she let go entirely

“I’m sorry, I.. I didn’t mean to hug you for… for so long,” Amity said as she turned her head away from Luz.

“Hey,” Luz said, placing her hand on Amity’s to gain her attention. “You can hug me as long as you’d like! I want to hug you too, for no other reason than just because I want to.” Luz then opened her arms up to let Amity back into her embrace.

“You’re… you’re so nice,” Amity said while sniffling, and threw herself back into Luz’s arms. “I’m just so scared. And I… I felt so alone before… you came here.”

“Don’t worry, I’m here now, I’ll stay here with you, I promise.” Luz lifted her hand to the crying witch’s hair. “I remember when I was younger, I would cry at night about having to go to school. I was so scared, but my mami would come into my room and pet my hair. That would always make me feel better.” Luz paused for a moment to reflect on her fears. She tried to imagine what Amity was going through, but she knew this was more than anything she had ever felt. “Would you like me to pet your hair? Maybe it’ll help.”

“O-okay,” Amity timidly accepted. Luz gently placed her hand on Amity’s hair and began petting it, soft and repetitive rubs, back and forth.

“Your hair is so pretty,” Luz said, mesmerized by it while she petted it.

“Thank you,” Amity said between tears. She buried her face into Luz’s shoulder, and she could hear and feel herself breathing. She noticed something odd; she could feel that her breathing was slowing down. She focused on her heart and felt that it was slowing down as well. In fact, ever since Luz came here, she noticed that her thoughts were less scrambled and more focused, specifically on Luz.

“So,” Luz said, still stroking Amity’s hair. “Do you want to talk about anything? I’ll listen to you.” Luz followed that sentence by tightly squeezing Amity with her arm that was still hugging her. Amity reciprocated and held on tightly with both arms still.

“I…” Amity trailed off. Even though she no longer felt alone, she was so scared. Scared to be alone again and without anyone to keep her safe. “Can I… a-ask you something?”

“Of course you can,” Luz said in a soothing tone.

“H-how long can you stay?”

“As long as you’d like, Amity.” That was both the answer she was looking for and the wrong one. Luz was willing to stay with Amity, but now it was up to Amity to say how long. How do I ask her to just stay with me until I’m better? Amity questioned herself. I don’t know when this attack will end. Amity steeled herself and began to answer.

“I-I don’t know how long I’ll be like this… I’m so scared to be alone again.” Luz’s mouth hung open, heartbroken by what she was hearing.

“Amity,” Luz said, hugging her tighter than she had all night so far. “I’ll stay with you all night. I’ll stay with you tomorrow morning, and the afternoon, and even the nighttime. I can stay the whole weekend since we have no school! I’d just need to let Eda know.” Amity felt her entire body ease upon hearing that. All the tension that remained in her body, all the worrying thoughts of being alone; all of it was gone. The security of knowing that she’d have Luz here to make her feel safe all weekend was enough to stamp out any worries she had.

“Luz,” she said, crying once more; but not out of fear or sadness. She was happy. So happy to finally feel the relief of her panic attack subsiding. It wasn’t fully gone, but it was enough for it to become manageable. “Thank you.”

“Of course, Amity. I’d do anything for you.” After a few moments of holding an embrace, Amity was willing to let go to give each other some space for a few minutes. She looked over to Luz and once again realized how tattered her clothes were.

“I-If you’re okay with sleeping here, I can get you some pajamas so you don’t have to sleep in those clothes.” Luz smiled and nodded. Amity stood up and struggled for a moment to gain her footing and walk. She had been sitting all day, after all. She walked over to the closet and grabbed a pair of pajamas for herself and Luz. “T-the bathroom is right across from my room, so you can change in there.”

* * *

After the two girls changed, they sat in bed for a while, talking about random things. Luz mostly led their conversation, not wanting Amity to feel pressured to lead it. They kept each other in their embrace, and Luz occasionally gave Amity a tight squeeze to show her that she was still here, still eager to make her feel safe and loved.

“It’s getting late,” Amity said, much calmer now. “Do you want to go to bed?”

“Sure. I can sleep on the floor if you’d like, I already basically do that at Eda’s house,” Luz said with a laugh. Amity didn’t answer right away, but Luz knew why. “Or, I can sleep in your bed next to you.” Amity sighed in relief this time and eagerly nodded.

“Can we…” Amity said, trailing off for a moment. “Can we still hug each other?” Luz’s heart melted at such a sweet question.

“Of course we can! You don’t have to worry, I'll keep hugging you until you tell me not to!” Luz laid down on the bed and opened her arms to accept Amity in. Amity climbed into bed, laid next to Luz’s side, falling into the hug, and in turn, Amity hugged Luz as well.

“Thank you, Luz. For everything.” Luz giggled softly.

“You don’t have to thank me, Amity. I should thank you for telling me how you’re feeling! If you didn’t tell me, then you might have still been upset and feeling alone. That hurts me so much, I never want you to feel that way. From now on, please tell me if you’re feeling like this, okay? I want to be here for you, Amity.” The witch once again felt the all too familiar feeling of tears welling up in her eyes. She clung to Luz with what strength remained in her body from today and let out a few soft whimpers. Luz reciprocated and held her tightly to console her.

“I-I promise.” Amity said after letting out her tears. “Luz, thank you so much, I just don’t know how I got so lucky to have you in my life. You’re the nicest and sweetest person in the world.” Luz felt so overwhelmed by the compliment that she choked up when she went to speak. She took a moment to collect herself.

“Amity, I’m so lucky to have you. You mean so much to me and I would do anything for you!” Luz raised her hand and cupped Amity’s face in it. “And I think that you’re the nicest and sweetest person in the world - both of them. You’re nicer than anyone I’ve ever met on earth too.” Now it was Amity’s turn to be speechless. She closed her eyes and nuzzled her head onto Luz’s shoulder. I really am the luckiest person in the world, aren’t I? she thought.

“Thank you, Luz. Thank you so much… I’m sorry I’m like this, but I’m so glad you’re accepting of me.”

“Amity,” Luz immediately said, a serious tone in her voice. “Please,” she continued, returning to a more soothing approach. “Never apologize for having a panic attack. There’s nothing wrong with you, so you don’t have to apologize. It’s okay to feel this way.” Amity opened her eyes upon hearing this, especially that last line. It’s okay to feel this way. It was such a relieving sentence to hear. To know that what she was experiencing wasn’t some humiliating thing to be ashamed of.

I’m not broken. It’s okay to feel this way. And I’m loved.

Luz felt the tears drip down onto her shoulder as Amity let out more. She held the shivering witch close and gently caressed her face; calm, rhythmic movements. Nothing unpredictable. Just a loving touch to make her feel safe. Luz then leaned forward and placed a gentle kiss on the witch’s forehead.

“I love you… so much” Amity said between her sniffles.

“I love you too, cariño,” Luz cooed. “Now, get some rest. I know you’re super tired.”

“I am…” Amity murmured.

“I’ll watch over you until you fall asleep,” Luz assured her. “And if you wake up while I’m asleep, promise me you’ll wake me up, okay?”

“Okay…” Amity softly said.

“Good.” Luz placed another kiss on the witch’s forehead. Amity clung on tight as her heart fluttered. Yet, it did not flutter fast for hours on end due to anxiety. It fluttered because she was safe, consoled in the arms of Luz, and for receiving a kiss from her. It fluttered, knowing that she would still be here in the morning, still being hugged by her, and still being loved by her.

Amity’s heart fluttered because it was okay to feel this way.