Welcome to the January 2014 Carnival of Natural Parenting: The More Things Stay the SameThis post was written for inclusion in the monthly Carnival of Natural Parenting hosted by Hobo Mama and Code Name: Mama. This month our participants have talked about the continuity and constancy in their lives. Please read to the end to find a list of links to the other carnival participants. We've now been cosleeping for six and a half years. And by cosleeping, I'm referring specifically to bed sharing. Just before Mikko was born, we bought a king-size mattress and put it on the floor of the single bedroom in our apartment. Even in the hospital, he slept in my arms, and once he came home, he slept beside us — and still is. When Alrik was born, . We experimented with putting a crib mattress on the side of the king, but mainly we just all piled onto the king — Alrik on the edge with a foam bumper, then me, then Mikko, then Sam, who sometimes ended up on the floor. Lately, and even though one of us is just a little two-year-old squirt, we end up doing jigsaw arrangements every night.
Sometimes there's a hard skull in my spine. Often my bum or my knees (depending on which way I've turned) is hanging over the edge. When I come to bed after the three boys are asleep, I sometimes end up settling down sideways at the foot, like the family dog. Sam recently had a dream he was trapped in a tunnel — and awoke to find himself unable to turn over because of two certain little boys who had hemmed him in. Now we've been considering a third child, which would mean five in a bed, and — nope. Not with our bodies and our sprawlers, not in a king, and the king mattress is the widest conventional mattress you can get (76"). (A is longer but narrower at 72", for those .) We love cosleeping and bed sharing, but we need to find a way that works better to let everyone sleep comfortably. Since we now live in a two-bedroom, we figured the solution was simple enough: make over the second bedroom, which right now is kind of a catch-all room , into the kids' bedroom, as has always been intended for whenever the kids wanted it.
We bought an and intended to place a full-size mattress underneath, perpendicularly. That way, there could be multiple configurations of bodies: one to two kids up top, one kid and an adult below, two kids below, possibly even two kids and an adult below, and the full could double as an extra guest mattress. We figured the three boys could all go to sleep in that room for awhile, with one or more coming back to join me in the big bed if they woke up. But when we broached this idea to Mikko, it was met with resistance, and sadness — and I assure you, it was not one-sided sadness. I've never been one of those people who's been afraid my kids would never outgrow cosleeping — I've always known they would, , same as babywearing, same as wanting me to hug them in public. Kids grow, things change; I knew this would, too. But I wasn't raring to make it change now, right away, when they're both still so young. Mikko loves the time when we're falling asleep and he can talk to Sam and me about his day and ask all his myriad questions.
Both Mikko and Alrik love snuggling up against one of us — sometimes sprawled on top of us — and waking up to see us there. And, frankly, I love it, too! So we decided to move one more step up the ladder of hippie eccentricity and create … a family bedroom. Oh, I know, we already have one by default — but we're moving up that rung because now it will be . Sam has this idea to move the loft bed into our room. He's measured it out and discovered that if we turn the ladder to face one wall, but with enough clearance for the baseboard heaters and therefore for kids to shimmy by and climb up the back, that the width of our king mattress (76") will just fit underneath. I also had the idea of extending the sleeping space down below by buying an extra-long twin mattress, which is the same length as a king (80"). We could maybe even combine the ideas by buying a regular twin mattress (75" long), putting it under the loft, and having the king be pushed next to it. Then it's sort of a loft over a super-duper king!
You know what this means, though, right? What with the unschooling and the long-term breastfeeding already marking us, it means we're officially becoming The Weirdest People in Our Family. Our parents already ask us (and the kids!) when the boys will be moving into their own room. Just imagine the looks on their faces when they visit and see one family sleeping room, and one play room in place of the kids' bedroom. That bonus might be worth it in itself…. But what I'll really love is continuing the path of gentle nighttime parenting we started six and a half years ago. Yes, it's culturally frowned upon (kids in a marriage bed! oh, noes!). But if it's working for us and our family, then there's no reason not to find ways for it to continue to work. I have to say, I'm excited about this cosleeping thing changing up a bit but staying the same for awhile longer! Visit Hobo Mama and Code Name: Mama to find out how you can participate in the next Carnival of Natural Parenting!
Please take time to read the submissions by the other carnival participants:(This list will be updated by afternoon January 14 with all the carnival links.)Tiny House Giant Journey loft with space saving Tuft & Needle Mattress I don’t know about you, but without proper sleep I morph into a zombie-turtle. That’s right, a hybrid of a zombie and a turtle. I slowly waddle and groan through my daily routine and occasionally retract my head into my mobile shell. It’s not a good look. Sleep is a necessary part of life and creating a healthy bedroom should be a priority in any tiny home. Space is valuable in a tiny house and sleep is something you can do in a compact area. This is why the majority of tiny housers choose to sleep in a loft. Lofts are space savers! They are also therapeutic. A compact loft can act like a cocoon for the human body. After all, homo sapiens have been sleeping in small dark caves for thousands of years! The effect is organically comforting. Gallery of Tiny House Lofts:
I love my loft because it gives the bedroom a feeling of separation. If I need privacy, I simply tell Guillaume: “I’m going to read in the loft.” He knows I need “me time” to remain sane and that little partition goes a long way. Sharing a tiny space is not always easy and while respecting your partner’s needs is important in any home, it is absolutely critical in 125 square feet. Climbing is not for everyone and, take it from me, making the bed in a loft requires some funky gymnastic moves. Some tiny housers prefer non-lofted bed options. In order to save space, this usually means incorporating convertible furniture. Take Lina Menard’s Lucky Penny (pictured above) for example: her comfy couch converts into a full size bed! Watch the full video tour to see how Lina can pull her bed out into a full size sleeping space. Zyl Vardos “Dewdrop” Tiny House Another non-lofted convertible bed is used in Abel Zyl’s “Dewdrop,” where a Japanese-style floor couch pulls out into a bed from underneath an elevated kitchen.
Abel’s bedroom designs are always innovative and whimsical. His unique rooflines create inventive loft spaces as seen in the Pinafore, the Fortune Cookie and the Ark. Taking cues from the RV and sailing industry, Derek’s tiny couch design converts into a full size bed. It’s one of my favorite folding bed designs, that I’ve seen in a tiny house, so far. Watch a full video tour of Derek’s tiny house in New Orleans. Andrew Odom from Tiny r(E)volution came up with a compact roll out bed design that will knock your socks off! Check out the above video to see it in action. Lastly, I want to show you this awesome electric lift-bed design from Tiny Idahomes. The downstairs bed actually lifts to the ceiling at the touch of a button, allowing for additional space when not in use! Out of sight, out of mind. I am curious how much electricity is required to power this bed – personally I’d prefer an old-fashioned pulley system. Perhaps this is not a great option for off-grid power, but it’s a cool design for those looking to stay on-the-grid.
The shape of your tiny home is going to dictate possible bed options. For example: Music City Tiny Home (pictured below) has a shed roof, which is adequate enough space for not only one, but two lofts, while Russ’s Gypsy Wagon is far too short for a lofted bed. Instead Russ keeps it simple with a ground floor twin bed. Music City Tiny House – 1 of 2 Identical lofts Russ’s Gypsy Wagon with Twin Bed Dormers expand a gable roofline and are becoming popular in tiny home construction even though they add weight, build complexity and create a blocky aesthetic. Curved rooflines, such as the Lilypad Tiny Home, allow for more headroom but are difficult to construct and add weight. A simple a-frame would make a gorgeous tiny home, but the loft would be teeny tiny. A gable roof, such as in Brittany’s Bayside Bungalow is a charming and easy to construct, but might be tight for two dreamers… unless you like to snuggle. Here are a few bedroom ideas I’d like to see functioning in future tiny homes: 1). Hammock Bed, 2). Murphy Bed, and 3). Bunk Beds.