Giovanni Gambino, son of famed mobster John Gambino, has issued a warning to ISIS: Don’t mess with the US. I spoke to Gambino as he slouched in a white plastic lawn chair in the driveway of his New Jersey home. Gambino elaborated on the statement between mouthfuls of his Aunt Linda’s gabagool and hot pepper sub. “All my kids know, when I’m in my chair, in the driveway, listening to old Mets games, do NOT bother me. But these assholes – look, if those clowns make me get out of my f***** lawn chair, they will regret it.”Here comes Very Little Carlo, Fat Ang, Tummy Ache Sal, Nick at Nite Nunzio and The Slut. When asked specifically how he would prevent a terrorist attack Gambino said, “Ashpet, come on sweetheart, don’t ask me about my business.” I reminded him that he was the one issuing a statement and he relented. “I’ll send Little Big Tony, Joey Mercedes and Spanish Steve over to their houses with a little message from the greater New York area.” Gambino then offered me a large plate of baked ziti and would not continue the meeting until I had eaten two full plates.
“Look, I haven’t gotten out of this lawn chair since the day I turned 40. It’s like one day I was a healthy young man and the next day all I wanted was sit here in this plastic chair,” Gambino mused. “Something about a plastic lawn chair calls to every aging Italian man – but I will get up out of this chair and I will hunt down any mope who threatens this great country.” When asked if he would even be willing to miss his weekly bocce game at the Forum Club, Gambino showed resolve. “Angelo deSimone hosts a beautiful game every Sunday – Stinky Carlo brings a tray a eggplant parm, No-Nickname Christopher brings wine he makes in his garage. And, so help me God, if we hear of one of these ISIS sons of bitches is planning something, every single one of us would abandon the bocce court and take them for a little drive.” The spread at bocce night – Gambino would miss THIS to fight ISIS. Gambino then took me on a tour of the miniature Greyhound rescue he constructed in his back yard last summer.
When we were finished he presented me with a plastic Shop-Rite bag full of food to take home including 3 beefsteak tomatoes Gambino had grown in his small greenhouse. “Remember, you tell ISIS,” Gambino yelled from his chair as I pulled out of his driveway, “I’ll make em sorry their mother ever met their father. God bless you, you’re a sweet, Irish girl! I’ll pray to St. Christopher for you.” Gambino continued to yell various blessings at me as I slowly left his cul du sac. You're now signed up to get the AA newsletter every week.The previous homeowners left us a pair of plastic lawn chairs but I didn't love the beige, so I decided to try spray painting plastic! It turns out that it's easy to spray paint plastic and painting my beige plastic lawn chairs immediately made them look crisp and new. Here's a peek at our "new" aqua lawn chairs! And here's what they looked like before: Painting plastic is nearly identical to painting other surfaces. Although many Rust-Oleum paint products can be applied without a primer - or include a built-in primer - it was recommended that these chairs be primed first.
I cheated and used a Rustoleum paint + primer combo in flat white as my first coat, because that's what I had on hand. Other than that, the steps for painting plastic were simple! How to Paint Plastic Chairs: Scrub the chairs with Mr. Clean. I used Q-tips to really get into the corners (there was a lot of gunk on these). Rinse with a garden hose to thoroughly remove soap and let dry. Using multiple, thin coats apply the primer. With one hour (or after 24) apply multiple, thin coats of paint (I chose Painter's Touch in Satin Aqua). Tips and Tricks for Painting Plastic Chairs: I didn't flip the chairs over to paint the undersides, because they willInstead, I painted what could be seen underneath the seat with a few blasts of spray paint. These new-fangled spray cans that can spray in any direction are excellent for speeding up a project because instead of flipping a piece of furniture back and forth (and wasting paint on the bottom), I just
crouched down and sprayed upwards to cover what's visible of the underneathI did make sure, however, to spray the backs, under the arms and the insides of the legs thoroughly. It's definitely an aerobic activity making sure that the surface is evenly covered from all angles. Although this paint dried quickly - it was dry to the touch in an hour - it takes a bit longer for paint to fully cure on plastic (about a week), so I made sure to set these chairs aside to ensure they could cure in peace. Unlike metals and woods, there's always a chance that not all plastics will accept paint well, but these turned out perfectly. It took one can of primer and three cans of paint. The only reason I required so much paint was all of the nooks and crannies at the back of my chair! Plus it was a kind of windy day. Every day on the lake is a windy day, so sometimes I don't even notice. A simpler chair and calmer weather would require far less, I'm sure. Time-wise, it took less than an hour (including scrubbing, but not including dry time).
The former owners left all kinds of goodies behind. Did you catch Szuka and Handy Hubby in the paddle boat we unearthed last week? I shared an adorable photo on Instagram but I'll admit something just to you: the whole boat ride Szuka was pretty calm as we paddled back and forth close to shore. She leaned against our backs, which was so cute. I hopped out and Hubby paddled away so I could snap a photo. She started to fuss and fuss and fuss and ... SPLOOSH - found herself in the water. Seconds after she hit the water, she was already booking it to shore. The girl can paddle. I'm not even sure the top of her head got wet, thanks to her awesome doggy life jacket. Once she made it to shore, she looked at me like, "we're both safe, but what about him? Who cares about him? Let's escape while we can" and she took off toward the house, looking back to make sure I was behind her. Special thanks to Rust-Oleum for providing the product for this makeover and many more upcoming projects!