The best way to get your toddler to stay in their bed all nightJolie Kerr is a cleaning expert and advice columnist. She'll be here every week helping to answer your filthiest questions. Check the Squalor Archive for assistance. Are you still dirty? Okay, well, this is crazy, and I'm still a little shocked right now. I just woke up in the act of wetting the bed for the first (second? time in my adult life. I'm not afraid of cleaning up urine, and I think I even know some things to do: The sheets are already off so it wouldn't soak into the foam mattress, I found some odor spray, and I'm soaking up the liquid as fast/best I can. Here's the twist, though: It's not my bed. I'm at my girlfriend's mother's house ... and said mother is SITTING IN THE DINING ROOM AT 5 A.M.!!!!! Currently, I'm hoping she's awake because she's going out early, in which case I can spring into action (?). But meanwhile, you popped into my head, and I thought I'd ask for advice on the best way to ninja-clean my way out of this while everyone's asleep.
Damage so far: two sheets, some underpants I can throw in the trash, and a little urine on my (fast-drying) shirt. It says a tremendous amount about me that it wasn't until my third reading of this question that I thought to myself, "You know? It's a little weird that a stranger thinks of me first in the face of wetting the bed." I mean, I get it. obviously get it—and I entirely love it—but every once in a while, I catch myself taking a step back and looking at this life I've created for myself and am just like, "Hm. Existential ramblings aside, this is a not-uncommon thing to have happen. Wicked embarrassing, to be sure, but not uncommon. Please take solace in that if it happens to you! In an ideal world, this kind of thing happens when it's just you in the bed. In an ideal world, this doesn't happen at all, but you know what I mean.) If it happens when there's someone else in the bed, though, you gotta 'fess up. Mostly because you have to get the sheets off the bed in order to clean them and prevent the pee from seeping into the mattress, and stripping the sheets is a thing that the other person in the bed will notice is happening.
In this particular case, I would suggest enlisting your girlfriend to help with the awkward mother issue—have her throw the sheets in the wash and tell her mom she got her period unexpectedly. You may owe her one, but for whatever this is worth: If it were me, I would absolutely no doubt rather lie to my mother about a period accident than tell her that my boyfriend wet the bed. If you really, absolutely cannot get to the washing machine, head into the bathroom to do a little hand-washing triage. If there's a tub, that's probably going to be your best bet, since hand-washing a section of bed linens is a bit of an awkward affair. So: Run the pee-pee part of the sheet under cold-to-lukewarm running water to flush out as much as you can. Use a small amount of whatever soap you can access most easily (hand soap, bar soap, liquid laundry detergent if it's around, whatevs) and rub the material against itself to create suds and coax out the piddle. Then rinse thoroughly under running water and wring out as much water as you can.
Next, grab a towel and roll the wet part of the sheet up in it, which will extrude more water. The final step in this stealthy, MacGyver-esque sheet-washing process is to turn a hair dryer on the remaining wet spot until it's dry enough to go back on the bed. But really, don't do that. Just stick with the period lie and launder the sheets in the machine.In this case, the mattress was spared, because our bed-wetter woke up as the wetting was happening. But more often than not, that isn't the case, so I'm including general mattress-cleaning instructions here, because I'm a giver. The biggest thing to remember when treating stains on a mattress is to use as little liquid as possible—if you saturate it, it will take forever to dry. Of course, in the case of wetting the bed, the mattress will already be fairly wet, so the first step should be to soak up as much of the urine as you can using either a towel (that you will later launder, natch) or paper towels. Since urine is a protein stain, you'll want to use something enzymatic on it.
If you have pets in the house, go ahead and use whatever product you've got for cleaning the messes they make off your floors, carpets, furniture, whatever. Something like Nature's Miracle would be just grand. If you don't have that, a laundry pre-treatment spray like Shout or Zout will also work. Give the soiled part of the mattress a light misting, then give it a li'l scrubbing with a towel or sponge, then bear down on the area with a dry towel to absorb as much moisture as you can. You may want to perform a few light applications for maximum effect. Once you feel confident that the mattress is clean, allow it to air-dry before putting the sheets back on. (Turning a standing fan toward the mattress will speed that process up.) If, for whatever reason, there's still a lingering odor once the mattress has dried, sprinkle a liberal amount of baking soda on the affected area and allow it to sit for 30 or so minutes before sweeping or vacuuming it up.There are your "Oh no no no no no, I wet the bed!" instructions.
A word of warning: Don't read this and think to yourself, "I will never need this; I am a grown-up who does not wet the bed!" Because if you do that, you know what's gonna happen? Jolie Kerr is the author of the book My Boyfriend Barfed in My Handbag … And Other Things You Can't Ask Martha (Plume); more of her cleaning-obsessed natterings can be found on Twitter, Kinja, and Tumblr. Adequate Man is Deadspin's new self-improvement blog, dedicated to making you just good enough at everything. Suggestions for future topics are welcome below.Small Shared BedroomShared BedroomsSmall BedroomsBig Girl BedroomsGirls BedroomBedroom IdeasBig GirlsFold Down DeskDesk With StorageForwardDo you have siblings sharing a small bedroom? Check out these shared bedroom ideas for a small space! Waking Up Dry: Helping Your Child Overcome Bedwetting Although bedwetting is rarely caused by a serious medical disorder and often resolves itself, for 5 million children in the United States over the age of 6, it’s a condition that can create anxiety, embarrassment, and shame.
These feelings are heightened when the child is invited to a sleepover — that familiar childhood rite of passage.According to Dr. Howard Bennett, a clinical professor of pediatrics at George Washington University Medical Center and author of Waking Up Dry: A Guide to Help Children Overcome Bedwetting, the combination of several factors is the usual culprit that leads to bedwetting: an increased production of urine during the night, a small bladder capacity, poor arousal from sleep, and constipation.Dr. Bennett advises parents to keep two issues in mind. “First, bedwetting is common, and children should not be punished for it. Second, parents should always remember that bedwetting is a medical problem — it happens because a child’s brain and bladder are not communicating with each other at night.”In addition, Dr. Bennett warns of another type of disconnect. “Bedwetting is a topic people often shy away from. Parents may be embarrassed to broach the subject with their pediatricians, and doctors typically assume that if a child is wetting the bed, the parents will inquire about it.
Parents need to be proactive and talk with their child’s pediatrician.” What Parents Need to KnowDr. Bennett offers the following answers to the most frequently asked questions about bedwetting.Does bedwetting run in families?Is bedwetting more common in boys or girls? Does bedwetting go away on its own? How can I tell if my child is motivated to work on becoming dry at night? He starts to notice that he’s wet in the morning and doesn’t like it. He tells you he doesn’t want to wear Pull-Ups anymore. He doesn’t want to go on sleepovers because he’s wet at night. Do you recommend restricting fluids in the evening to keep children dry? Some people think restricting fluids after dinner helps children stay dry. Although this helps some children, it doesn’t work for most — if a child limits fluids, he may wet the bed with four ounces of urine instead of six, but he’s usually still wet. My approach to restricting fluids is practical. If a child tells me that limiting fluids helps him stay dry, I give it my “OK.”
Otherwise, I generally don’t recommend this approach. What is the best way to treat bedwetting? The bedwetting alarm is the product that yields the best results. This device teaches the child’s brain to pay attention to his bladder while sleeping. Bedwetting alarms have two basic parts. (1) a wetness sensor that detects urine and (2) an alarm unit that produces a loud sound when a child wets the bed. How does the bedwetting alarm work? The alarm’s sensor has the ability to detect small amounts of moisture. When a child wets the bed, the urine in his underpants turns on the alarm. When the alarm goes off it awakens the child so he can go to the bathroom and finish urinating in the toilet. After weeks of hearing the alarm, the child’s brain learns to pay attention to the full bladder signals and he wakes up before wetting the bed. Are drugs an effective way to treat bedwetting? The medication that is prescribed most frequently is called desmopressin (brand name: DDAVP).
Desmopressin is a manufactured form of the hormone the brain produces to decrease urine production at night. The effects of desmopressin only last for a short period of time, and children usually relapse when medication is stopped. For this reason, doctors generally recommend this for sleepovers, vacations, or special occasions.Words of Encouragement for ChildrenDr. Bennett recommends the following strategies to help ease your child’s anxiety.Do not punish or shame children for being wet at night. Remind children that bedwetting is no one’s fault. Let children know that lots of kids have the same problem.Let children know if anyone in the family wet the bed growing up.Maintain a low-key attitude after wetting episodes.Praise children for success in any of the following areas: waking up at night to urinate, having smaller wet spots or having a dry night. Encourage children to go on sleepovers. Dr. Howard Bennett is a clinical professor of pediatrics at The George Washington University Medical Center and the author of