Answer....

See ammay,

There is a lot of emotion in your lines. I understand that....But let me tell you both the sides....

You entered the TS without expecting any further strong relations....We thought initially that it is just a place to train us...

But....later, the time proved that it is not simply so.

The TS will have a strong impact on you, because we not only did study together...we lived together. At the last, it gave you a number of people to share your feelings, a series of incidents to make you happy, left you with a very good collection of memories for your heart and finally left with a "feeling of lost"

When the TS was over at once...it was a sudden transition.....

But.......

Some unexpected and un-envisaged incidents which occurred in the due course of the time, made you to be confidential....

Even though, it didn't ocuur at a sudden,

once the training school completed, slowly you make yourself confined...

You were to limit your circle........But you felt happy even that time....

At those times.....

Let me tell you.....

There were people......But you couldn't share your feelings

There were helping hands......But you couldn't take them

There were smiling faces to share with you......But you couldn't join them

There were meetings filled with fun.....But you couldn't participate

And the central point is.............

By doing so, you didn't do any mistake

You were in a position to do so.....

But never it was realized by the people that.....you did it with a reason

In fact, most of the people didn't even realize that you were confined.....nobody knows the oceans in your heart...the thunderstorms in your mind......

For obvious reasons, you couldn't share any of the thoughts with the people...

Thats an old story...

Time decides the situations...

...the situations decide our priorities

Our priorities decide our path and

...ultimately the path leads us to some destiny......

As I already told you, once you have gone through several cliffs and canyons, we will be in an ultimate confusion of good-bad and right-wrong...

Life teaches at different stages, different lessons...

Apart from the same old philosophy,....

Now....

Regarding the people.....

Whatever the "fuss made and the losing of your friend-circle" which you assume is actually a mere feeling with no existence....

Let me tell you a bit clear....

You still have the friend cirle and people to share your feelings...

But, as I already mentioned you, different kinds of dedications last at different times...

You might remember that, on every farewell day of us (be it in +2 time or btech time), we would have done promises with so many people that we would never part each other and in continuous contact.........Right/

But whats the reality?............you just remind yourself

Do you feel you lost your old friends (at +2 or btech)?

Its their memories which you associated with them stays in your mind, reminds you always and tells you "we are not away from each other".........They are still the same in your mind........only thing you cannot physically feel them.....Thats it

Similarly, the memories in your mind is nothing but the people are with you.....Memories are everything..

Now......some reality..

The same old vinod, sachin, idiot and so on.......are still available for you.....to share your feelings....Never have the feeling that you have none.

Once upon a time, I discussed a particular issue with you.....

That is.....everybody is thinking that others are going ahead and they are lagging behind...
Its just our assumption about their mind...

In fact, nobody knows the depths of one's heart unless he/she shares with them.

Its only an assumption that everybody got good partners....as I already told you nobody knows till they completely involve with another person.....the reality only will be realized with steadiness...............and when the reality is realized, it cant be shared with all...........Always remember that all that glitters is not gold

I'm sure that everybody will have a compromise in their married lives.........

YOU have a beautiful life ahead and you are not able to realize it.....

When you found the purpose of your life, you'll definitely realize it beautiful and that moment is not at so far...

Believe me, talking with an experience of six years with you, you didn't lose anything and didn't do any mistake...........The only thing is, the wound is little deeper, takes little time to get completely healed........Till then, these feelings may bother you....

The only medicines you need now are confidence, courage and conviction.....

IN BRIEF:

The incidents in which you felt the you were the doer, are not created by you......Hence the feeling of mistake or guilt should be removed.

The people whom you felt left you, are actually still around you....They never left you...Actually those who were sent by god into your life with a purpose, they will be with you always....and never bother about that........YOU WILL NOT LOSE ANYONE BY YOUR OWN.

Anyone whom you felt left you forever, even after you try to have them, have actually served their purpose created by god in association with your life......Dont bother about them.

Its true that you had complex feelings in your mind still, but remember that things will be clear and well understood with time........Believe in time, a form of god.

Last, life will always give you another chance (not only second but many). Because an ending always leads to another begining....

and the take home message is "Do the things which you do when you feel happy..........and they are the ones which will make you happy"