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This book would make a good gift to a married couple.It is comprehensive and thoroughly biblical. The strength of the book is that it is fair in presenting competing views on various issues--like parenting philosophies, the use/non-use of birth control, the permissibility of divorce and remarriage, homosexuality, etc.Chapter eight is the best chapter in the book. It includes excellent and practical help for parenting--especially teens. For example the authors list seven signs of spiritual maturity that parents should look/pray for in their teens:(1) an independent life of personal worship and devotion; (2) a desire for corporate worship and instruction; (3) a pursuit of fellowship in the body of Christ; (4) an openness to discuss spiritual things; (5) approaching decision-making from a biblical perspective; (6) a desire to serve others and to share one’s faith; and (7) a desire to give of one’s financial resources to support God’s work.The authors also include a conflated form of questions (originally from Douglas Wilson) to utilize with prospective spouses of their soon-to-be-engaged children: 1) Are you a Christian? Tell me your testimony about how you came to faith in Christ. Tell me also about your current Christian reading and devotional life. 2) What is your church and denominational background? Which churches have you attended in the past, and of which church are you currently a member? 3) Do you attend church regularly and are you actively involved in the life and ministry of the church? Tell me about your involvement. 4) Tell me about your family. What kind of lifestyle are you accustomed to? How would you describe your parents’ marriage and what was it like growing up in your family? 5) What is your relationship with your mom and dad, and how are you getting along with your brothers and sisters? 6) How would you describe your work ethic? How many jobs have you had in your life, and what was your experience? 7) What is your current occupation, what are your vocational goals, and what do you see yourself doing ten years from now? 8) Do you have any debt? If so, what kind of debt and how much? How do you make financial decisions? What kind of standard of living do you hope to have? 9) Tell me about your experience in school. What are your educational goals and how are you planning to go about meeting them? 10) Is there anything in your background that, if I knew it, might make me less likely to approve of your spending time with my son or daughter? Have you ever been in trouble with the law? Can you tell me about your previous relationships? For young men: Do you have a problem with pornography? For young women: Do you believe in dressing and behaving modestly? 11) God willing, are you hoping to have children one day? For young men: How do you plan to support a family? How do you see your role in relation to your future wife? For young women: Do you enjoy exercising hospitality? Do you like children? How do you see your role in relation to your future husband? 12) What attracts you to my son or daughter? What do you think you have to offer to this relationship? What do you think is God’s will in this regard and how do you know? In chapter 13 the authors fairly and boldly analyze the currently popular way to do church called family integration. They write:The family-integrated church approach can actually tend to promote a lack of general integration as these churches may at times neglect to include those from broken families . . Nowhere in Scripture is it taught that families must cluster together at all times when the church is gathered. Just as fathers may lead their family in worship and Bible reading at home, so the pastor of a local church may lead the entire congregation made up of people from a variety of familial and social backgrounds, in joint worship. . . Another question that arises is to what extent the family-integrated approach is predicated upon a theology that stresses the continuity between Old Testament Israel and the New Testament church and neglects to give proper recognition to the pronounced New Testament emphasis on individual faith.Weaknesses: The book reads kind of like a dictionary or encyclopedia with repetitive and formula-like conclusions. Few will read through this book in its entirety. However, this is a volume that will be rewardingly pulled off the shelf periodically when issues related to family, parenting, and marriage arise.
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