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10 Things You See in Porn that Don’t Happen in Real Life
We all know that the classic pizza delivery guy porn scenario is unrealistic. And that one very bad pickup line doesn't ever immediately lead to hours of hot sex. Still, porn is a contributor to sexual education and there are parts of it that are too often mistakes for reality. The problem with that is obvious: "Anybody who would get their sexual information from pornography alone would be highly misled," says Neil Malamuth, professor of communication and psychology at UCLA. To avoid being counted among the "porn educated," here is some clarity about its most common deceptions and exaggerations.
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In theory, the desire to orgasm at the same time as your partner has a certain sweetness to it. The first problem is this coordination is much more complex than it appears in porn. There are some sex toys and methods that you can use to attempt this feat, but that brings us to the second problem: If you are spending all your time and energy trying to climax together, you probably aren’t enjoying yourselves and each other as much as you should be.
Squirting and gushing are popular tricks of women in pornography and are often portrayed as female ejaculation. Tests of the fluid produced have shown these are not the same thing. Female ejaculate is chemically similar to semen. The fluid produced by squirting, on the other hand, is likely watered-down urine. While women can learn to squirt, sex researcher Beverly Whipple doubts women can train themselves to ejaculate.
Malamuth has studied porn consumption, often outside of the United States, and he’s found that people do draw inspiration from what they watch. “It certainly has made them want to try to copy certain acts to try that thing they haven’t done before,” he says. Using porn to expand your sexual horizons is reasonable, and possibly healthy, but remember that the vast majority of these films feature actors who are paid to play up the enjoyment of every moment. Remember this and don’t set yourself up for disappointment when sex in the shower doesn’t do it for you, or expect your partner to be as enthusiastic about this experimentation as the actors were.
Pornography is generally produced for a male audience and tends to depict women in a submissive, or at least very sexually permissive, way. This is not the reality of most sexual partnerships. This disparity has made people worry that the way men dominate over women in porn encourages men who watch it to commit violent sexual acts. Malamuth has studied this in his own work. “For the majority of men, it does not have that impact,” he says, “but for those men who already have other risk factors, heavy consumption of pornography — particularly the more extreme or the more violent — can add fuel to the fire.”
You already know that men’s penises and women’s breasts tend to be bigger in porn. For women, these large, perky breasts accompany thin bodies, which is a relatively uncommon combo in the general populous. Vaginas shown in porn are also of a very restricted aesthetic. For men, the disparity between porn penis size and average can be outrageous. The average man’s penis is 3.6 inches when it’s flaccid and 5.16 inches when it’s erect. If you’re overweight or un-manscaped, it can look even smaller — notice the male actors are rarely either of those.
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A photo taken on October 5, 2015 shows a view of a short erotic film through a virtual reality headset during a presentation at the MIPCOM audiovisual trade fair in Cannes, southeastern France
Virtual reality pornography is allowing for more 'intimate' and 'personal' experiences but could bring horrors, warn experts
The availability of VR is changing the kinds of sexual and pornographic experiences people are looking for, say creators
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People could soon be watching more and more "intimate" pornography through virtual reality headsets, according to experts.
New VR technology could allow for personal experiences of a kind even more real and perfect than the real world, and the consequences are expected to change every form of experience we have with technology today. Inevitably, those advances are also being used in the pornographic industry, to create new kinds of virtual reality videos.
One of the early adopters of virtual reality for pornography claims that the new technology is leading to new trends in the kind of pornography that people are searching for and watching, she told a meeting at Web Summit, according to news.com.au.
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"“People are asking for more romance, closeness, more talking. This is something you’ll find in a real relationship but not everyone in the world will have access to that kind of relationship,” said Dinorah Hernandez, who runs a studio devoted to such videos. “To be able to have an experience with another woman could give them something that maybe the real world can’t.”
But that kind of perfection, above and beyond the real world, might bring with it problems, according to researchers.
"As a society we are always looking for new and novel experiences but the porn industry brings with it an added risk because of its sexist stance and exploitation of women," said Dr Madeline Balaam, a Newcastle University researcher who has
"We are already obsessed with body image and the digital industry is no different, creating the perfect virtual woman from Lara Croft to sex-robots. VR porn has the potential to escalate this.
"Our research highlighted not only a drive for perfection, but also a crossover between reality and fantasy. Some of our findings highlighted the potential for creating 3D models of real life people, raising questions over what consent means in VR experiences. If a user created a VR version of their real life girlfriend, for example, would they do things to her that they knew she would refuse in the real world?"
Research has suggested that VR porn could bring with it a whole host of ethical questions and challenges to relationships. The extra "reality" added by the technology could mean that people believe watching such content to be cheating on their partners, for instance, or it might allow people to act out fantasies that are considered violent or extreme.
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"Pornography has played a key role in the development of new and emerging technologies - from the stereoscope in the 1800s through home video and now virtual reality," said Matthew Wood, who was also involved in the Newcastle research. "But what VR offers for the first time is the opportunity to move from being simply an observer to being a participant and this changes the experience massively.
"One of our findings suggested VR pornography could be something more like cheating on a partner because of the increasing 'reality' of the VR experience.
"We found that for most people the potential of a VR porn experience opened the doors to an apparently 'perfect' sexual experience - a scenario which in the real world no-one could live up to. For others it meant pushing the boundaries, often with highly explicit and violent imagery, and we know from current research into pornography that exposure to this content has the potential to become addictive and more extreme over time."
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