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The PanditJust how shall we define a Pandit?It’s not a panda, nor a bandit.But rather a Pandora’s boxOf sophistry and paradox.Though Oxford [sic] gave it a degreeIt maintains its neutralityBy quietly hating General CliveAs hard as if he were alive.On weighty international questionsIt’s far more Christian than most Christians;It’s ever eager, being meekTo turn someone else’s cheek.Oft has it said all men are brothers,And set that standard up for others,Yet as it spoke it gerrymanderedProclaiming its private Pakistandard.The neutral pandit walks alone,And if abroad, it casts a stone,It walks impartial to the last, Ready at home to stone a caste.Abandon I for now the pandit, I fear I do not understand it. -Ogden NashQuite a savage bit of doggerel, but even today, and more notably closer to home, he remains the most grossly misunderstood and perhaps posthumously derided figure in Indian history.
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