Granny Dream With Young Boy

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Boy, 8, takes a granny for his dream bride
17 March 2013 - 03:36 By KHANYI NDABENI
Eight-year-old child groom Sanele Masilela's nuptials made headlines around the world this week.
In a ceremony before dozens of family and friends, the Pretoria Grade 3 pupil married a 61-year-old family friend last month to appease the ancestors.
When the Sunday Times visited his home this week, Sanele was playing hide-and-seek with his mates and his "wife", Helen Shabangu, was back with her real husband.
Details of their union were published widely in the UK and Australia, among other countries, but in Mamelodi, east of Pretoria, where they live, the wedding barely raised an eyebrow.
Unlike the traditional practice of ukuthwalwa, in which families marry girls as young as 12 to older men, this marriage was only a ceremonial one - albeit with all the trappings of a white wedding.
And except for one day of makoti (young bride) duties, Shabangu has gone back to treating Sanele as a child from the neighbourhood - although both seem to find amusement in referring to each other as "my husband" or "my wife".
Sanele's mother, Patience Masilela, who gave the marriage her blessing, paid the R7000 lobolo to Shabangu's family and picked up the R18000 bill for the wedding.
On February 16, Sanele, who attends Pfunzo Ndi Tshedza Primary School in Mamelodi, was kitted out in a shiny grey suit to march down the aisle with Shabangu, a mother of five and grandmother of three.
Masilela and her son explained this week that the wedding was triggered by a series of visions the boy received from his late grandfather.
Masilela interpreted this as a sign that her late father, Busy Masilela, who never married, wanted Sanele to do so on his behalf.
She said Sanele picked his bride himself. His mother and his new wife work together at a dump site where they collect material for recycling and resale.
Said Shabangu: "I heard about his intentions two years ago. At first I was shocked, but after a lengthy discussion with my husband and children about the purpose of the wedding, and what might happen if it did not take place, I agreed."
She said her husband, Albert, who attended the celebrations, had even jokingly "warned" her not to embarrass him at her in-laws' home.
Tradition dictates that the new bride perform a series of household chores at the home of her in-laws the day after the wedding, which Shabangu did.
Sanele's mother, who said the visions had now just about stopped, believes the wedding served its purpose.
"I did what I had to do so that my son wouldn't die or get sick because we were ignoring the ancestor's message," said Masilela.
On Wednesday afternoon, Sanele, who is still excited about the interest in his wedding, was quick to take out pictures of the big day.
Pointing to one of the children in the bridal retinue, he said: "I want to marry her. She is pretty."
Masilela said Sanele knew the wedding was not legally binding and that he could marry the girl of his dreams one day.
David Bogopa, an anthropo-logy lecturer at the Nelson Mandela Metropolitan University, said there was nothing untoward about this practice, which was common among Bapedi, Basotho and Zulu people in rural areas.
People honour messages from their ancestors to avoid "misfortune", he said, and these ceremonies generally took the form of a traditional wedding, accompanied by the slaughtering of a cow as part of a ritual to communicate with the ancestors.
A white wedding was unusual, he said, but the ancestors would have been appeased by the performance of traditional rituals in the run-up to it .
Meanwhile, the newlyweds are looking forward to a ceremony on their first wedding anniversary, when Sanele will be formally introduced to Shabangu's extended family in Bushbuckridge, Mpumalanga.
Read more at the SA government's online coronavirus portal or use the 24-hour public hotline: 0800 029 999
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