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50 posts • Page 1 of 5 • 1, 2, 3, 4, 5
by dahlquist » Thu Sep 12, 2013 11:07 am
I'm a 17 year old girl and for as long as i can remember i have had an attraction for older men. Especially pedophiles. Since i was 6 years old, whenever a story on the news came up about someone caught with child porn, or even men going to prison for molesting young girls its always turned me on i would wish more than anything i could have been there with them, or even been the little girl. when i was 11 i would look up registered sex offenders and try and frequent their area in hopes of becoming theirs. Its horrible i feel like such a terrible person... I feel like i might also be attracted to young girls because whenever i see one i wish more than anything to see her with a way older man I don't know whats wrong with me, but Ive searched and searched and have never found anything on young girls being attracted to pedophiles. or what it means.
I am so confused by these feelings, i mean its actually causing problems in my life. For example i used to baby sit a little boy (which im extremely un attracted to little boys) and id take him to the park as per his mothers request, but id go there and nearly have an anxiety attack brought about by the inner battle of pleasure vs. morals caused by the abundance of pre pubescent girls running around so close to me. I feel so out of place in the world and i cant find answers anywhere. I'm sincerely nervous about my ability to continue this battle i know i must, but it just wears me out, having to constantly repress my desires. I'm too nervous to talk to a professional about this in person out of fear of what they'll think of me. I just cant go through this anymore. please any help would be appreciated. This is my last resort for answers.
And another question Had i the nerve to go meet with someone about getting help how would i go about accomplishing that?
by Aidan Xavier » Fri Sep 13, 2013 8:14 am
dahlquist wrote:I'm a 17 year old girl and for as long as i can remember i have had an attraction for older men. Especially pedophiles. Since i was 6 years old, whenever a story on the news came up about someone caught with child porn, or even men going to prison for molesting young girls its always turned me on i would wish more than anything i could have been there with them, or even been the little girl. when i was 11 i would look up registered sex offenders and try and frequent their area in hopes of becoming theirs. Its horrible i feel like such a terrible person... I feel like i might also be attracted to young girls because whenever i see one i wish more than anything to see her with a way older man I don't know whats wrong with me, but Ive searched and searched and have never found anything on young girls being attracted to pedophiles. or what it means.
I am so confused by these feelings, i mean its actually causing problems in my life. For example i used to baby sit a little boy (which im extremely un attracted to little boys) and id take him to the park as per his mothers request, but id go there and nearly have an anxiety attack brought about by the inner battle of pleasure vs. morals caused by the abundance of pre pubescent girls running around so close to me. I feel so out of place in the world and i cant find answers anywhere. I'm sincerely nervous about my ability to continue this battle i know i must, but it just wears me out, having to constantly repress my desires. I'm too nervous to talk to a professional about this in person out of fear of what they'll think of me. I just cant go through this anymore. please any help would be appreciated. This is my last resort for answers.
And another question Had i the nerve to go meet with someone about getting help how would i go about accomplishing that?
by minotauros » Sat Sep 28, 2013 9:00 am
Most of us would avoid girls like you, because we like you and wouldn't want to get ourselves into trouble. I'd be careful though, the ones that wouldn't avoid you are usually the no selfcontrol types, and that can get dangerous. Take care of and protect yourself.

I know where you are coming from. I'm a hebephile and a gerontophile.

Why not look at those teenage boys your age that look older or younger? They'd love you, especially with everyone else avoiding them because they look too young or too old.

To be honest though, humans are sexy creatures. And its quite alright to find them attractive.

Don't feel bad because you feel the way you do. There's nothing wrong with you from what you've said about yourself. You're a normal human being.
Live life by the horns, or die wishing you had.
by dahlquist » Sat Sep 28, 2013 9:06 am
Only 2 responses when my post has been viewed over 300 times..... Im simply looking for any answers anyone can give me on why i am the way i am and how to go about fixing it.
by platonic » Sat Sep 28, 2013 9:57 am
Taboo always has an appeal too; enjoying the forbidden or rare can be very fun.
In the past I was very down on thoughts, but don't worry! Enjoy your likes (while avoiding all offending) and you'll be a happier person.
Viva!
by Yorkshirelass » Sat Sep 28, 2013 10:27 am
dahlquist wrote:Only 2 responses when my post has been viewed over 300 times..... Im simply looking for any answers anyone can give me on why i am the way i am and how to go about fixing it.
by BrotherHobo » Sat Sep 28, 2013 7:35 pm
I know it's considered gauche to call "#######4" on other people's posts, no matter how unlikely it seems, but what teenaged girl would ever have a problem getting involved with an older man, ever? Are you kidding me? A willing, eager, attractive teen girl who WANTS a relationship with an old guy, some guy she perceives as a bit of a predator? It's like every creepy old short eyes' dream come true. If you were to ask for volunteers on this forum you'd probably get twenty replies, eager to fly to your city on a moment's notice. I don't think so. I cannot believe that any willing teenage girl, anywhere, EVER has trouble finding any guy she wants, young or old. The problem is that there are so few of them. My money is on that this poster is a guy who wishes he could find such a girl.
by Arbie Wun » Sat Sep 28, 2013 8:01 pm
there is a possibility that this desire has in fact arisen from something deep within you that you may still be unaware of, there are rare occasions where the victim can in fact fall for the predator. Maybe when you were very little you were abused and craved that attention because it was the only attention you got.

I know at times I was suffering that very same issue, I craved the attention of older women especially those with glasses. This is because my abuser was a female who wore glasses to read and her position within the community granted her access to children over a very long period of time.
The bright light at the end of a dark tunnel could be an oncoming train, but it could also be the way out of the darkness...
by Samantha_E » Sat Sep 28, 2013 9:26 pm
It is odd that you liked that as a six year old. Did you understand what it meant back then?

Also, there is such a thing as e-mail therapy or phone therapy. It tends to be a bit cheaper as well. This may be something to look into if you are not comfortable with face to face yet?
Don't say I'm out of touch,
With this rampant chaos your reality.
I know well what lies beyond my sleeping refuge,
The nightmare I built my own world to escape.
by confusedperson812 » Sun Sep 29, 2013 2:52 am
Okay i am going to confess something.

I also thought of older people doing things with me also when i was a twelve year old boy.

Guess what.

I was attracted to myself as a 12 year old and i am now still attracted to boys of twelve.

My personal opinion. You are a homo pedo like me.

I am a boy and like boys.
You are a girl and like girls.

We both wanted someone to do something to us as kids. Therefore we are born pedos.

Now i cant say that for sure. But it is my theory.
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