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Malicious rumors that I am a cannibal have been wildly exaggerated, and are bordering on untrue. All that stuff they found in my kitchen? Totally taken out of context. Those were artichoke hearts and kidney beans. That was a Granny Smith apple, and Earl Grey tea. And those are lady’s fingers in the fridge which . . . okay, let’s not talk about the lady’s fingers.Seriously though, this book was a tasty treat. Very well written, striking a balance between academic scholarship and decadently delicious black comedy. I devoured it in just a few sittings, and it left me hungry for more. It went down so easily, like a pan-seared infant seasoned with a bit of lemon and black pepper . . . might . . . I suppose. I say this purely as a matter of conjecture. Mmmmmm . . . . Lemon pepper infant . . . People have been eating one another for thousands of years, for a diverse array of reasons, most of which probably made a lot of sense at the time. Some primitive peoples held superstitions that the mortal remains of a vanquished foe would strengthen a conquering warrior, others were just looking for a good source of protein. Some people, like the Donner party and that ill-fated Uruguayan rugby team, were driven to the last taboo by threat of starvation. More complex reasons underlie the drive to consume human flesh and blood among others, including werewolves, Jeffrey Dahmer and Catholics. Tannahill explores homophagy in all its sinewy, fatty, salty, sickeningly sweet detail, from the ubiquity of cannibalism in mythology and religion to the fact that vampires are alive and well, at least in every conceivable entertainment medium. Her fascinating account takes us on a delightful journey through the most grisly corners of gastronomy, revealing in gory detail humanity’s dark underbelly. Mmmmmm . . . human underbelly . . .I used up most of my good cannibal jokes in my review of Hannibal. People seemed to really eat them up, but I’ve exhausted all my tastiest morsels. It’s just leftovers on this one. Bon appetit..............Did you hear about the happy Roman cannibal?He was gladiatorA selfless humanitarian sells off all his possession and uses the money to go to New Guinea to try to fight starvation and disease and enrich the lives of the suffering people there. He gets captured by cannibals who eat him, and find him to be delicious, but then after a short while they all get sick and start vomiting. Because you can’t keep a good man down. What do cannibals make out of politicians? Bologna sandwiches. Two cannibals were eating together. “Your wife makes great soups” says the first one. “Yes” agreed his dining companion, “but I sure am going to miss her.”Did you hear about the Cannibal with a special taste for Scandinavians?He had a Swede-tooth.Why did the cannibal eat the tightrope walker? He wanted a balanced meal. How can you help a starving cannibal? Give him a helping hand.Did you hear about the cannibal family man?He had a wife and ate kids.
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