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The one who makes my life whole,

Where do I even begin? We're both people who had heard, seen, and been through a lot of things, and coincidentally, it's the one who we're supposed to love that put us through those things. Looking back at it now, I can only laugh at the ridicule that my father was putting on me...but I could have not fought those thoughts without you. Without you, I would be a completely different person. I'm not sure how different, but I know I wouldn't be as happy as I am with you. Because of you, my world is a lot brighter.

I remember first joining the dance team, I was honestly out of place and I really looked like I did not belong there. Luckily, I was wrong. It was a group of eleven other boys that took me in, and among them was you. It was the first night where we went to that South-Eastern Asian restaurants and I was late.. a lot of us got gifted with these bamboo hats, and because I was late, I didn't get one. It didn't matter to me, I was just really glad that you guys were so accepting of me into your group! I didn't notice it at first but when Joonyoung was recording for his vlog, I could see you holding onto your hat and looking at me. I didn't pay attention at your staring due to the other boys talking to me, but as soon as I watched the vlog again, I could tell that you had every intention to get close to me. Did I think it was weird? Well..a little. You just put the hat on my head and you went back on the other side of the table. I'm not even sure if you could tell at the time or see from the video, but I was blushing so much. Heck, even Hyungseo was making fun. But that was when I knew I was beginning to develop feelings for you.

Back then, I didn't dance so well; the first showcase was coming up and I felt I was letting our little team down. However, you were the first one who stepped up to help me. We spent hours on end preparing, just the two of us. I remember the first time I had gone over to your place for practice, your father gave me the biggest stink eye when he opened the door; and let me tell you, it reminded me of my own father--it sent so many shivers down my spine. I shook it off though, for that first hour..until he came in and started treating you like crap in front of me. I remember clearly consoling you that night, telling me your life story: your mother's passing, your father's treatment, and you let me into the deepest parts of your mind. That was also the first night you cried to me...the first time we also shared our first kiss. Not long after, we started dating. We did try to hide from the group, but Youngjae...what a big mouth.

The one thing I noticed a lot differently in Korea than in America is how early we went from dating to getting married. I had some fear and doubts about getting married so early, but I knew for sure that I wanted to spend my life with you by my side. At the young age of eighteen, we tied the knot.

We've been married for three years now and these were the best three years of my life. In the last three years, we learned a lot about each other; had our ups and downs, shared tears, and laughs, and we even became fur-dads. Who knows what the rest of our lives will hold? All I know is that we're stronger together, and because of you, I can forgive the world.

Love,

Ji-Lee Changmin