---

Die in sleep, die while you dream, just give it up now, death will let you rest in the world where you have no one, you can escape it all with this answer, you won't have to sacrifice anymore, you won't have to say or do things to make everyone like you, you can just choke yourself or suffocate while you have time, just give in and let it all slide, for nothing ought to be so enduring!

Family, I loved you all, but unfortunately, when you all fought, my mind could handle it, my heart sank. Is that even a family? I wanted to thank you all for being there for me, or even if it was a show from some, it felt good for once. But this life was a race, I got cramped. I tried to remain prepared but I couldn't do it.

All I wanted was to make a few, a handful of people happy from the bottom of their heat, just to see a smile that would have been meant a lot, but I just can't do it anymore.

Friend, Friend? I made a few when I changed my school, It took me 9yrs to get them well, but then everyone gave away and it became void again. I was a child in 4th, I barely knew that it would be this harsh, to just vanish those memories, Same happened. Why is it so cruel, why were we brought up like a family if we were to end up forgetting each other? Now, that I am alone, I realise I had a dream, simple and great, just a simple hard-working life, with little love and hate, but one whom I could rely on all the tie.

I thought I might find a friend who would joke and help me around, or perhaps be supportive, not necessarily one of my interests, but anyone would have been great who could see through this veil of my smile and make me realise that I am the one.

I wanted some love too, not just a familial one, but somewhat where I could have a future to look for.

Is it true that death brings everyone together, for all share the same destiny? I hope not, for I will be too afraid to break my loved ones for a second time.

DIE, DIE, DIE, DIE, DIE, DIE....this is my beat now, but less painful, knowing that it might just be the end.

All I wanted from life was a little, happiness, some laughs and memories; but my vision now limits me to this pad, for my farewell. I wish this wasn't the end. I wished some random person to actually listen to me, to know how I feel- but that's impossible, that's what life is.

I have witnessed people happy, what I wanted to make someone laugh with my jokes, make me laugh at theirs.

Why are people so mean, to never actually look around and realise that not everyone gets what they deserve? My ugly truth was something I can never erase but amend by helping people.

I tried to get strong-mentally, but then it weakened my body, when I looked after the physical, I just got dumber.

Is it the end...I hope no one else goes through what I have witnessed.

I hope when I die, no one sheds a tear, for if you were to feel it, you should have realised it sooner.

It was all decided from the beginning, a journey alone.